As an artist – no matter what your medium is – you may struggle with the thought, “I’m just not good enough.” This core insecurity has companioned the most successful people I’ve worked with. I am consistently amazed at this dynamic: The greater the ability, the greater the insecurity.
I’ll never forget the fortune cookie prophesy a friend of mine once taped to the side of his camera, “Talent does what it can. Genius does what it must.” This speaks to the degree of obsession required to channel creativity at an almost alien level. Talent tends to emulate what has gone before – genius shatters previous preconceptions about a medium and opens new vistas of understanding.
This distinction became personal to me when I realized that, though a professional musician, I could not “make music.” I could regurgitate music on the printed page – after considerable effort. I could even add my own “voice” to that music. I could not, however, take my instrument and create my own music. I have many musician friends who amaze me with their ability to do so.
In my experience, the consummate artist becomes slightly annoyed with those who sing their praises. They are energized by interactions with peers they respect – seeking a community that both encourages and provides constructive criticism.
Even in this environment discouragement takes hold. There is always a higher peak to climb, always another whose work evinces some deficiency in their own – always a critic whose indictment of their work cannot be dismissed as ignorance or misunderstanding.
“I’m not good enough.”
The inner voice that speaks like the toll of the bell as the coffin of your career is laid to rest. The last rejection letter, placed on a pile of rejection letters.
Be of good cheer. I come to proclaim:
You are ABSOLUTELY NOT good enough.
Never were – never will be.
Once you realize that, you can be unshackled to create at a whole new level – the level where you are not preoccupied with what others think – the level where you no longer serve yourself, but the One who sent you. The great lie in worldly wisdom is, “No one knows you like you do.” “Follow your heart.”
“To thine own self be true.” I believe this to be utter nonsense. In my experience, I know myself least of all. I certainly have very little capacity to see myself as others see me. Furthermore, the Creator – the architect of my soul is much more intimately knowledgeable regarding my inner workings than I could ever hope to be. So though I may not be good enough – the One who created me is.
When you seek His direction – your ability to produce reflects His plan instead of yours – a plan not dependent on ability but availability. Career breaks often come when you are at peace with abject failure. Contentment comes with His success through you – when you forsake the need to be known by others for the need to be known by Him.
We are all faulty vessels. Avoid the pretension, “It wasn’t me, it was the Lord.”
A true friend once noted, “Oh really? I didn’t think it was that good.”
